TikTok Influencers

Ah, nothing like a fresh cup of cringe in the morning.

We got so many people desperate for attention, they are eating out of toilets, chugging cough syrup, and now... faking tourettes?

These "influencers" will do anything for views, which is pretty fucking sad. 

But let's be real here. All they're desperately screaming is, "I want to get paid for doing nothing." And that's a pretty honorable goal in itself, I myself, would love to sit around all day and film myself doing stupid shit... while getting paid $100,000 a year.  

Just who the hell are the people paying for all this? I mean, do we have a bad case of the old farts with too much money? I guess as long as you get eyeballs looking, you can blast annoying advertisements at them then rake in that cash. But that's only if you are YouTube or the Tok. Still... it doesn't make sense to me. I mean, if I were selling shit, I wouldn't want my products advertised on some chick making a sundae with her own shit. But that's just me, I'm an old mother fucker born in the 90's. 

It is 2022, and we accept anything now. Anything.

So if you ARE going to go out of your way to fake a mental disorder... at least do it right. I mean what's up with this cringe shit? Bruh, you want people to smother you in views, but you couldn't even bother with spending an hour on Google doing some research. Check out the chick in this video then prepare your anus, because you'll be puckering that shit so hard, you won't shit for a week.

There we go again with the green hair and shaved head... and she got called out by someone who actually had tourettes. I mean, if you don't crawl under a rock after that... you probably got green hair and a half-shaved head.

I just don't care for these fucks, we got these peeps in their teens and 20's, and they're all like,

"Yooooo! Oh MAH GAWD, it is Charlie D' Alimio"

I don't know how the fuck that chick's named is supposed to be spelled. The one who does the hand dances on TikTok. Am I supposed to be impressed? Cool, you can do the Naruto gang hand signs. Great.

If someone walked up to me and said they were famous on TokTikPornTube, there is a 99% chance I won't know who they are. It's like, what is so special about your life that I would want to watch it. I got my own shit to take care of, I don't need to see your everyday problems too. Plus, it is annoying as fuck to hear all the screaming and see that fucking camera shake. Am I supposed to get dizzy watching this shit?

Everyone is just too over the top, it is like watching Japanese porn and the girl keeps screeching seductively into your ears. NO! SHUT THE FUCK UP! That's it, I ain't jerkin no more.

The problem comes when the new generation of asshats see this shit... they will want to be just like our "famous" interwebz stars. So our lovely children all grow up to be just as annoying, obnoxious, and aspire to filming themselves butt chugging Crown.


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